Pillowy Man Breasts
by Chip-Nips
Summary: A Tim and Eric trollfic. As gratuitous and crazy as possible.


"Now let's have a chat with our health-expert, Dr. Steve Brule! Steve?"

Jan smiled brightly as she turned her head away from the camera. She clasped Wayne's hands happily and whipped her head back around to smile at him. Wayne was grinning ear to ear as Steve began to drone in the background.

"We're almost done shooting for the day, hun," said Jan. "It's such a relief!"

She wiped her brow with the back of her hand and sighed.

"I know! We've been working on this segment for nearly four hours. We really need to teach the new camera man how to get my good side." Wayne laughed and shot Jan a flashy smile. Jan promptly giggled and squeezed her husband's hands tighter.

"That's why you gotta always ruhmember tah brush buhtween yer toes, ya dingus!"

Steve's segment was coming to a close so the happy couple regained composure and faced the camera.

"Thanks so much for joining us on Channel 5 News today!"

"See you soon!"

Jan and Wayne waved vigorously at the camera as it zoomed out and the lights dimmed on the set. Wayne hoisted himself off of his stool and stretched.

"We better be getting back to the dressing rooms. This polyester is really starting to chafe me."

"I know what you mean! The crotch in these pants sure isn't getting' any friendlier!"

Jan giggled goofily and stuck out her tongue. The two walked down the hall, waving at the crew and stopping occasionally to chat until they finally came to the dressing room door, traditionally adorned with a large star. The door shut behind them and the fluorescent lights flickered on dimly. Jan walked over to her mirror and shrugged off her vest. She began to unbutton her top when she felt two large hands on her waist. A low voice whispered in her ear.

"So, Jan...Do you need any help with those unfriendly pants?"

Jan turned her head around to be met with a big wet kiss on the lips from Wayne who was standing behind her, his hands resting on her hips, playing with her waistband. She pulled back from the kiss.

"Eric, do you really have to call me Jan like that just because I'm in the costume? It's a little silly isn't it?"

Eric smiled and tugged on Tim's earlobe with his teeth.

"I don't know, I figured we'd make things a bit interesting."

Tim made a small squeaking noise as Eric's teeth rubbed against the soft flesh of his ear. A shiver went down his spine and he tingled all over.

"Well...If you say so...'Wayne'..." He muttered with a sheepish smile.

Eric laughed quietly and kissed Tim again, this time deeper. Tim leaned into the kiss and grunted as Eric's slimy tongue entered his mouth. The oversized glasses shifted on his nose as the kiss became more and more intimate. Eric moved his hands up Tim's body and undid the rest of the buttons on the voluminous blouse. He slid his hands across Tim's chest and slowly undid the clasp between the cups of Tim's 1970s housewife bra. Tim's face became flushed and small beads of sweat rolled down his back in anticipation. Eric's strong hands grasped Tim's doughy man-breasts and squeezed them like a cheese curds in a cloth. Tim gasped and arched his sticky back. Eric rubbed Tim's pink nipples with his index fingers and rolled them around in circles.

"I feel like I'm tuning a radio," Eric whispered seductively into Tim's ear. "A really sexy radio." Tim writhed in his partner's grip and ground his pudgy ass into Eric's stiffened crotch.

"Oh Wayne..."

Eric slid his fingers down Tim's body and over his slightly tufted belly. The fingers wandered downwards still and undid the buttons on Tim's mom-jeans. Tim shook and his face got even redder. The sweat pooled in little puddles on his shoulder blades and between the folds of his chin. Eric moved his hand so that it was just barely inside the top of Tim's granny panties. Tim squeaked again.

"If you get any redder, I'll think I'm fucking Casey Tatum." said Eric, mockingly.

Tim tried to regain composure.

"Well, if your voice gets any deeper, I'll think I'm fucking his brother."

Eric smiled and ground his crotch into Tim's ass roughly.

"That can be arranged."

Eric grasped Tim's cock and began to squeeze it. His hand moved up and down slowly like he was using a pottery wheel. The combination of sweat and precum on Tim's member made a satisfying squelching noise. Tim moaned and reached his hands back to run them through Eric's hair. His pudgy fingers tangled themselves in the wavy brown locks as Eric continued to pump and grind.

"Oh Wayne...Let me do you now." moaned Tim in a shrill, girlish voice.

Eric pulled his hands off of Tim's cock and turned the smaller man around.

"Fine with me." He said with the same mocking tone and forced Tim to his knees.

In response, Tim promptly unsheathed Eric's throbbing erection. Without any preparation he shoved the whole thing into his mouth and sucked deep. He gagged on the girth of it and some spittle dripped out of the corners of his mouth. As he sucked and pumped his head back and forth, his lipstick smudged itself all along Eric's shaft. Eric put his hands on Tim's head and pushed in and out.

"That's it, Chip-chip. There ya go..." He grunted and leaned his head back, enjoying the feeling.

Tim continued to suck until Eric released a thick river of cum into his mouth. Tim gargled the hot man-milk cocktail and swallowed the frothy goo down. It dribbled out of his mouth and onto his flabby chest. Eric grinned sinisterly and pulled Tim to his feet.

"Now, Jan...What am I going to do with you?"

He grabbed Tim's meaty ass cheek and squeezed hard. Tim loved it when his partner got like this.

"Oh Wayne...Just fuck me already. I want to be your love slave." He leaned in and licked Eric's lips with his cum-drenched tongue. "Do anything that's on your mind."

Eric laughed and pushed Tim against the dressing-table, face-first.

"If you insist..."

He pulled down the granny panties in one swift motion and stuck his cock inside. Tim tensed up for a moment, but relaxed fairly quickly as he had become used to getting pounded in the ass by his larger partner after shoots. He rolled his hips back and forth instinctively and moaned loudly like a cow with an udder over-filled with milk. Eric's clammy pelvis slapped noisily against Tim's thick ass-cheeks as he thrust harder and harder. The noise was not unlike a freshly-caught fish hitting the deck of a rowboat. Tim's hot-pink fingernails dug into the wood of the dressing-table and his glasses began to fog up with passion.

"Aw YEAH, Wayne! Your man-banana feels so good inside my spaghetti-house!"

"I love it when you talk to me like that, Janny-baby!" Eric grunted again as sweat rolled down his forehead and down his cheeks, smudging his eyeliner beard.

"Pound me like yesterday's beef!" Tim cried out girlishly as his eyes rolled back into his head.

Eric grabbed Tim's shoulders and rammed inside as hard as he could. The lights and mirrors rattled as the two went at it like rhinoceroses on speed. Finally, Tim screeched out like a falcon and his essence spewed from his cock, dripping down his thighs. Eric's second blast followed shortly and he pulled out. Tim's ass was overflowing with frothy, white jizz.

The two sweaty men straightened up and took deep breaths as they began to clean up the mess. After about half an hour, the dressing room was back to normal and the two were dressed in their usual casual attire.

"Whew, that was somethin', eh Eric?"

"Sure was, Tim."

The two smiled at each other and made their way towards the door. Eric walked out but Tim stopped to pick up a potted plant that was left lying on the floor. Eric looked back.

"Tim, what are you doing now?"

Tim jogged up to Eric and began walking in step with him again.

"Sorry. In all the confusion, I forgot to fix the fern back."

END…I'm so, so sorry.


End file.
